“I don’t see an embryo,” said the ultrasound tech. I felt the pressure as she moved the wand around. Since I’d begun bleeding that morning, I was expecting to see a blip of life on the screen without a heartbeat, as I had ten years ago when I miscarried, but the screen was nothing but black. “I’m sorry,” she said. “There’s nothing there.” “I don’t understand,” I replied. I was surprised I ... View Post
Why I Refuse to be Pregnant with Fear
A couple days ago I announced to my Facebook friends that our family is anticipating a precious baby. I’m only six weeks along with this pregnancy and, by announcing, I’ve broken the unwritten rule that we don’t go public until we’re safely into the second trimester. Only two days before our announcement, I’d planned on waiting too. Because I’m all about protocol. I’m a rule follower. And because ... View Post
How to Survive Pregnancy Loss as a Couple
How can you and your spouse survive the grief and loss of a pregnancy as a couple? Here is what I learned. I lost my first baby only hours after I’d first heard the thump-thump of his heart during an ultrasound. Just six weeks along, our baby was all heart and yolk sac. When my body expelled that blip of baby I was alone. I remember the confusion of the pain, the cramping I thought was a ... View Post